Success and The Single Mom
Most recently, I wrote a piece about one woman’s personal experience working to get herself out of poverty, as well as enabling others to do the same. Through my research, I’ve come to wonder what makes women so resilient, so courageous, and so driven to succeed, and so drawn to giving of themselves, regardless of their life circumstances.
Photo courtesy of Lisa Rivers
Lisa Rivers is not afraid to take risks. As she studies photography, she tackles subject matter of all kinds with an unmistakable trademark: her attitude. She says a lot without speaking, often using her photos to express her beliefs, some serious, others tongue-in-cheek. Like her fellow classmates, she spends a considerable amount of time creating her portfolio and completing her assignments. But while her classmates head off to the bar after school, she goes home to her two children.
Lisa became a mom for the first time at age 19, and has two children, aged ten years apart.
“When it comes to discipline, I try to be as consistent as possible. Everybody is responsible for their messes, chores, and a level of respect in my house,” she says, ” I’m Mom, and I rule.”
According to the 2012 statistical abstract issued by the US Census Bureau, Canada is second only to the US in single-parent households with children. The IMFC (Institute of Marriage and Family Canada) has revealed that this trend precedes the figures published by the US, and that single parent households have been on the rise for the past forty years. In 2004, 81% of single parent homes were headed by women.
In Canada today, single parents continue to struggle financially compared with two-parent families (single parents are four times more likely to live in poverty and 8.8% more likely to rely on welfare). Lisa admits to having struggled financially in the past, but insists that others have underestimated her potential. She recalls a specific incident after being laid off from work in 2010.
“[My boss] leaned across the desk and asked if I would be okay. I said I would. He paused and said, ‘but it must be hard on your own with two kids. I can’t imagine’…I looked him square in the eyes and said, ‘You obviously don’t know me’. Of course I have my days when it’s harder than the ones before, but I’ve never felt like I couldn’t go on.”
And apparently, she’s not alone. The female participation in the workforce is on the rise (currently 60% today, with the participation rate for working single mothers now up to 63%).
If these numbers are anything to go by, single mothers can, and do, make it on their own.
Lisa attributes her success as a single mother to her supportive friends and family, as well as maintaining a good example for her children.
“I’m human and I make mistakes, but I am my children’s moral compass. Whatever I do, good or bad, is something that I will have to be able to explain to my children”, says Lisa, “I want to tell all the mothers out there, that if you find your own happiness and respect yourself, your kids will see that. Whatever they learn about life starts with you.”
beautifully inspirational!
i ABSOLUTELY adore you; thank you so much for choosing me to be a part of this project. It truly opened my eyes into who I am, and quite honestly, needed this reminder. Love for you, sweet soul sister <3
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